Second Look: Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place Season 2, Episode 12 – “Two Guys, a Girl and a Christmas Story”

Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place Season 2, Episode 12 “Two Guys, a Girl and a Christmas Story”
Written by Michelle Milzow
Directed by Michael Lembeck
Aired December 16, 1998 on ABC

With no Johnny and Ashley to be seen, it’s no surprise “Two Guys, a Girl and a Christmas” feels like a leftover episode of Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place‘s first season – and if that didn’t convince you, the presence of a rambling old man and another ill-timed new relationship for Pete is there to really nail the point home. And for what it is, “Two Guys, a Girl and a Christmas Story” is a fun little episode – a little too flat and cheesy to put itself into the pantheon of great American sitcom winter holiday episodes, but an effective episode that nonetheless lets the sitcom catch its breath, before heading into the final ten episodes of season two.

Unencumbered from their recent romantic pursuits, Sharon and Berg find themselves in supporting roles in “Two Guys, a Girl and a Christmas Story”, allowing the series to turn its attention back to Pete and his life and he continues to spiral in his quarter-life crisis. Now fired from his limo gig, Pete is working the holidays alongside Berg and languishing in his failed pursuit of professional purpose – that is, until local traffic reporter Kaitlin Rush walks into Beacon Street Pizza, frazzled and desperate for a new personal assistant.

As one might expect, Pete is no good at keeping his hands of his fellow employees, (especially after “Two Guys, a Girl and an Internship” – it’s not a trend that ends here, either) and quickly finds himself enamored by the pretty blonde woman who once saved Sharon with her precise reporting skills (this is when people under 40 still listened to AM radio – it was a thing, I promise you). But when Pete learns his new, famous girlfriend is also a single mother, it puts Pete into another precarious position, where his instincts and logic collide, unsure if he’s capable of dating a woman with a 10-year old child, and all that entails.

What I like about Pete in this episode is the unfailing consistency of his character; Pete is always willing to jump into the deep end without really considering what that means, or giving himself any way of getting out with his pride intact if things don’t work out (remember “Two Guys, a Girl and an Apartment”? He is clearly poised to do the same with Kaitlin, forgoing his newfound position as her personal assistant, because he suddenly finds himself falling for a woman who basically has a pre-made family ready for him to fall into; but in craving some role or sense of purpose in his life, Pete is not only putting himself at risk, but two other people he clearly already cares about.

Pete is so desperate to find definition to his life, we all know he’s not really going to consider these variables – even after other characters point it out to him, Pete insists he’s ready for the adult life. That is, until he takes her son Michael to go snow sledding at a local farm, and Michael crashes into a cow – when life comes at you, it comes at you fast, and “Two Guys, a Girl and a Christmas Story” points out that even though Pete is a person with his heart in the right place, he’s not ready to be a parent to anyone’s child, his own or otherwise. Despite the very visceral reminder he’s given, though, (Berg even tells him nobody would blame him if he decided to walk away) Pete is still young and dumb enough to think it’s a good idea; and at this point, after so many failed attempts at finding purpose in his life, it’s not hard to see why he makes the decision to start dating her anyway.

It’s too bad the other two plots of the episode – Berg has Mr. Harrison, an elderly patient, badgering him all episode, while Sharon is trying to plan her company holiday party for a big bonus – only exist as comic relief between Pete’s pursuit of Kaitlin, because there was certainly potential for Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place to use the holiday setting as a way to explore its other two characters, especially when the new characters pulling their emotional gravity away from the group’s core trio are conveniently absent for 22 minutes.

It is a bit of a missed opportunity for “Two Guys, a Girl and a Christmas Story” – especially when a nurse tells Berg Mr. Harrison has been lying about having family to spend the holidays with, something the episode does almost nothing with – because Pete’s moments of reflection are met with distracted responses from Sharon and Berg, themselves trapped in lesser stories which mostly revolve around silly punchlines (Kaitlin lies on-air to help Pete get her son to the hospital, trapping Sharon in traffic with a car full of pigeons), rather than anything that matches the emotional energy, or even the subtle reflection, found in Pete’s story throughout the episode.

It’s really Berg that is the more disappointing; Mr. Harrison just kind of follows him around, making snide remarks until a nurse randomly points out that he has none of the family he’s been bragging about (like his lawyer son he’s going to have sue Berg), and is alone for the holiday. So Berg goes and has dinner with him at his apartment to have a meal with him… and that’s kind of it. On some level, one can appreciate how light of a touch this story ultimately has – it isn’t drawn out and saccharine, but it also isn’t developed at all, which makes it feel more abrupt and clumsy than something resonant and meaningful for Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place to close out 1998 with.

Perhaps the most interesting thought “Two Guys, a Girl and a Christmas Story” posits is whether the addition of Ashley and Johnny into the fabric of the ensemble has been worth it – in the case of Johnny, Sharon’s aimless subplot is reason enough to keep him at least in shouting distance of her story. For Ashley, the answer is more incomplete; there’s no denying the Berg in this episode is a more relaxed, comfortable one, someone unencumbered from the frustrating romantic hamster wheel he’s spent the better part of the season’s dozen episodes running on, but whether this is a more interesting version of Berg is debatable. One episode isn’t enough to give a definitive answer – but knowing this is the first of a few episodes before Ashley’s re-emergence, it certainly raises an interesting question about what she’s added to the show, given how easily she slips out of the show’s narrative without it seemingly missing a beat.

Regardless, Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place‘s third holiday episode of season two falls somewhere between the experimental genius of “Two Guys, a Girl and a Psycho Halloween” and the more acerbic, wasteful “Two Guys, a Girl and a Thanksgiving” – while it is not going to top anyone’s list of memorable season two episodes, its lack of supporting characters makes it a somewhat interesting study in where the series is, from where it was before it changed its entire DNA with “Two Guys, a Girl and Someone Better”.

Grade: B-

Other thoughts/observations:

• Pete gets Berg an IOU for a sweater for his birthday (“what? I’m poor”, he tells Berg); in response, Berg tells him he’s getting him one free physical: “yeah, cough doughboy!”
  
• Berg: “I should be a rabbi… I bet they get Christmas off.”
  
• “The green beans and meatloaf are touching.” Berg: “It’s not what you think, they’re just friends.”
  
• Nobody tells Sharon her plan to do the 12 Days of Christmas for her company’s holiday party is a bad idea… and I love that.
  
• “It’s black tie, it’s boring, and you just want to eat a grenade.” I like how Kaitlin describes things.
  
• We don’t actually see Berg have dinner with Mr. Harrison… which kind of defeats the whole point of his character’s reveals, no?
  
• Over the credits, Sharon gets convinced to do one more run down the hill… until she accidentally sleds right into the field of bulls. Merry Christmas!
  
• Up next: Johnny asks Sharon a big question in “Two Guys, a Girl and a Gamble.”